The Lighter Side of the Law

The posts have been a bit “heavy” lately so I thought I would keep it light this week. I spent some time in court last week and also sat through a bunch of depositions. I am currently waiting to board a flight from Moline, Illinois which by the way is in dire need of an outdoor heating system!! Can’t John Deere handle that?

Many people ask me about court and litigation. It truly is a lot of fun and has many “special” moments. Since I do not chase cars anymore, and it’s too cold to hunt anything, I learned long ago that I need to get my adrenaline rushes when I can and enjoy every one. That explains so many years of PPC and IPSC competition! While nowhere near the thrill of a chase, litigation provides me with some adrenaline and a bunch of entertainment!

For example, in court or on deposition, people seem to have this amazing ability to live in their own little worlds and pretend that their actions, and their mode of dress, are known only to them! Really!?! You thought the pictures you posted on Facebook would NOT show up at your deposition?!?! You thought showing up to superior court in a t-shirt and jeans when you walked the cuffs down to the proper length was a great idea?!?!  Or my personal favorite from this past week, you thought bringing your girlfriend to court while trying to negotiate the contempt action filed by your ex-wife would give you an advantage?!?!?! You just cannot make this stuff up!

The LEOs who have known me for years sometimes ask me if I miss it. Well the answer is yes; except when I see someone directing traffic in the rain. I definitely do NOT miss that! I do miss the crazy calls, the dispatches that no one will believe, like a woman who heard a snake in her basement, and sitting in a parking lot after a hot call winding down telling jokes.

Alas, unless Al Qaeda takes over the Marietta Square and I get called in to stand a post, I will be relegated to arguing cases in court, taking depositions and watching the public life of the lower 2% of society’s bell curve from afar. Fortunately, I love the practice of law. It is a great profession, and I get to look after and help LEOs like I never could have done on the street.

However, if you see me in court, on the road or out socially, feel free to share your latest experience with a tin foil hat wearing complainant, the guy who dropped his wallet climbing through a window during a burglary or the guy who stopped to ask you directions during a felony traffic stop. Who knows! I may see one of them in a deposition soon!

Stay safe!

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